Artem Nesterenko. Is it easier to change the world than to change yourself?
Artem Nesterenko is an Internet entrepreneur who sells knowledge and develops various business areas, earning millions. He knows how to reorient himself to the market and find new opportunities quickly, but it was not always like that. Artem tells us about the changes in life and his personal path to success.
Artem, tell us from your own experience, when do changes come?
From my many years of experience working with people, I realized that people come to meaningful changes in their lives in only two ways:
1. When everything is very bad, all bottom levels are broken and it is no longer possible to live like that.
2. When everything is not so bad, but still something is wrong and you urgently need to reach a new quality level.
In the first case, people are ready to run to astrologers, fortune tellers, neighbors, feminists, YouTube experts, and coaches — to some person who knows the answer, as it seems to them at that moment. But having once again failed, they believe that the problems are not at all in their head, but in those whom I listed in the previous sentence.
For someone, who is not doing so badly, everything is much easier. They have a firm conviction that only they can pull themselves out of their swamp. And, of course, they have a very different approach to change. They are looking for step-by-step information on how to do it faster. Not “easier”, but faster.
They also have 2 trump cards in their arsenal.
The first is that they are fully prepared to make difficult decisions.
Second, they bear 100% responsibility for their choices (including past ones) and are not busy searching for their destiny.
How did it all happen for you?
Until the age of 30, I lived when everything was bad for me. I call this the “Fall” level.
I wanted to change something, but instead of achieving my goal, I got a new big problem. I rested my forehead in order to solve it, and it even seemed that I was one step away from victory, as relations were falling apart at that time, and they had long been falling apart, I just chose not to notice it. I tried to close the hole in the relationship, as the quality of life began to fall. Money was sorely lacking. I started to deal with finances and my health began to deteriorate, I quickly gained weight, lost sleep, and swelled up, or all at once.
I began to deal with health, and the business got worse again. And like that, it was all the time. Moreover, the universe with its sense of humor throws you problems with your loved ones, which you have to deal with. And instead of solving your problems, you solve the problems of loved ones.
What was this period like? How long did it last?
I remember this period of time as walking through a maze. Every attempt to change something in your life rests on the impossibility of getting out of current problems. In one day, I could find myself in three situations:
1. It is absolutely clear what needs to be done, but there are absolutely no resources for this. No time, no money, no connections, or no energy at all.⠀
2. It is not at all clear what exactly you need to do. There is complete chaos all around. Looks like you are in hell.
3. Generally, everything is clear, but it is not clear what exactly to do now.
Well, and, the bonus 4th situation, which is already simply constantly present: you don’t want anything at all, you have apathy. You drink a couple of bottles of beer, eat stinky octopus-flavored crackers kinda like a rich man and watch Comedy Club.
I felt like the king of Shit. Whatever I do deteriorates or breaks immediately. And the further it goes, the bigger the gap in my head is. The gap between where I am and where I want to go.
And at one very terrible moment, when my father died, and after 3 months my mentor died, I didn’t care about anything: situations, debts, people around me, my past, my future, and the whole world. I took a break from this chaos and started looking at only one thing: where did I mess up so badly?
This happened with a deep understanding that after all this situation did not just happen to me. I turned off all this noise in my head and finally heard my soul. I started to understand what I really want. I realized that I drove myself and it’s time to change radically!
But what really cracked me up was when I realized that I broke new bottom levels as a result of my choices, my decisions, and my actions. I thought at the time that these were cool decisions and that I was cool! But it wasn’t true.
Well, the third thing is that I can’t get out of this mess on my own. And at that moment, when I thought that this was already the very bottom and it would not get worse, it suddenly became even worse.
And how did you manage to get out of this situation?
At some point, it dawned on me that my worst enemy is my logic! It was playing against me for a long time. And at that moment I realized that the only option left was to give control of my actions to external control.⠀
I began to look for guides (mentors) to a new level of life. My brain went berserk that I had made the decision to carry out the guides’ recommendations as orders — immediately, furiously, and unquestioningly. The brain did not agree with these tips! They went against my logic. And that was just great!
The main thing at this moment was not to study, but simply to do it! To complete assigned tasks. And most importantly, to do it well.
At that moment, it didn’t matter to me exactly how I got out of this bottom, why I got there, and how to do it not to get there in the future.
All I needed at that moment was a new RESULT.
I focused on simple, massive, and furious work!
By someone else’s rules.
Though I wanted to whine and look for an external source of problems. But I asked myself the right questions and answered them honestly.
Who’s to blame that I’m at the bottom?
What do you need to understand to get out?
— Nothing, this understanding is empty. The greatest deception is to put an equal sign between understanding the path and walking the path.
Who can help me for free?
— No one, everyone absolutely does not care about you and your life.
Who will take pity on me?
— The same whiners as you are now.
Why do so many people get into these situations? And what can be done to prevent this from happening?
Have you noticed that it is easier to change the world than to change yourself?
Many people often make plans to change the world/environment/country/… not to get to the most important thing — changing themselves.
But, the results don’t matter. The bank account doesn’t care if we’re tired or can’t sell. We will not get money in our account from that. Your body doesn’t care that you went to bed at 3 a.m. yesterday and you don’t want to train it today. The body will weaken if it is not trained.
The results don’t care. Our actions care. By which you can understand if we care or not.
There will never be a good or right time. And while the whole country is sitting in front of the TV or on a smartphone checking the news every 10 minutes, start building a plan for pumping yourself. Believe me, watching the news will not change the situation, but by pumping yourself up you will change your future. Just make the right choice.